June 6th, 2010

Busch Stadium 6-5-2010

Saturday. A disaster.  

     As I was standing on the third base side I kept calling to Randy Wolf, Jeff Suppan, and Carlos Villanueva for a baseball. I had a couple hard hit grounders hit towards my general area but I didnt want to step on anyones toes if they were going to go after them. Well, most of them ended up back on the field after they bounced off the wall.

     Finally I got Randy Wolfs attention, and I asked him for a baseball that he had. After about five minutes of calling to him I was relieved that he started to pay attention to me. I had about fifteen minutes left on the clock before batting practice ended, and I wanted to at least come away with one baseball. So Randy Wolf fielded a couple, and tossed one in. He turned and held up the ball. I raised my glove, and readied for the throw. This is where I really needed to take a picture. Randy Wolf wasnt exactly close. He was nearly in left center. So he and I had quite the distance between us. But he fired one over to me anyway. Now let me paint this picture for you. I had a small child to my right which at this point is irrelevant. I had a guy about my age to my left, and his girlfriend to his left. I had a two parents with a four year old two rows up to my left. Im facing the field, and Wolf as the ball sailed my direction. Well, not exactly. The ball actually was going more towards the parents with the four year old. Was the ball intended for that kid? I doubt it. I was the only one screaming for a baseball. Plus I had Brewers gear on. I instantly turned, and half hurdled the row directly behind me to make the catch. So I was basically straddling the seats. I reached out, and I could barely feel the ball brush the end of my glove.

     I really thought I had it. But it was such a terrible throw from Wolf. He is 4-5 with an ERA of over four. Anyway. The ball dropped down into the seats, and rolled right to me. I actually had to lunge for it because I could see other people scrambling for it. So in the process I busted up my rib cage, and chest against the seats. Which Im happy to report Im fine. But it still hurt. So once I returned to my area to shag anything else that came my way I was soon interupted by security.

     ” You need to give that baseball to the kid.” He said as he cleared his throat, and stepped beside me one row back.

     I simply ignored his direction. I replayed the whole thing in my mind, and I realized that Randy Wolf had thrown the ball, and this little four year old boy tried to also catch the ball. The ball hit him right in the face. So as I looked back at the security guard I glanced to the kid that was crying. His mother was holding him. You know in that motherly love type of way.

     ” Sir, you need to give the baseball to the kid.” He said again.

     ” Listen, Im not trying to be the bad guy here but when a baseball is thrown into the seats by a player every fan gets one opportunity to catch the ball. If you miss the ball, or you bobble it, or you drop it thats it. If you cant get the ball back yourself, and some other fan gets it youre out of luck.” I explained.

     ” The ball was thrown to that little kid by the player.” The security guard said.

     ” Thats arguable, sir. The ball was throw to the FANS. It just so happened that the boy was in the path of where the ball was traveling. So was that fan, that fan, and that fan. I just so happened to end up with the baseball.” I said as I pointed out all the other fans that went after the ball too.

     ” Youre a nice guy.” He retored in a sarcastic manner.

     ” Sir, you dont have any authority to come down here, and dictate or moderate who gets what baseball. Its an unfortunate accident that the kid got hit in the face with the baseball. But that doesnt mean he automatically gets the baseball. It wasnt “thrown” to him either. I made 100% of the effort to get Randy Wolf to throw the ball in the first place. So technically by YOUR rules the ball belongs to me.” I said in a more heated tone.

     ” You need to leave the stadium.” The guard raised his voice to me.”

     ” Under what law? Under what regulation? Whats your reasoning? Because some unfortunate kid took a Randy Wolf change up to his grill? Im not leaving the stadium. You security guards need to find a real job!” I exclaimed back raising my voice as well.

     He just stared at me. I stared at him right back. What bologna. Now Im on the black list on the third base side all because this kid took a baseball to his head. None of that was my fault, and no I wasnt going to GIVE that kid the baseball. Do you know how many baseballs Ive attempted to catch but misplayed them, and some other fan ended up with it? A lot. I never got some security guard to come down, and stick up for me. Maybe I didnt cry enough. Maybe my mommy wasnt there to cuddle me. Well, whatever. I left after that.

     As I walked up the stairs to leave I rounded the corner to enter the main aisle. Guess who was there to intentionally back up, and run into me? My favorite security guard. I didnt realize it was him so I pardoned myself, and kept walking. Until I heard his annoying voice again.

     ” I hope youre leaving the stadium” He called after me.

     ” No, Im actually not leaving the stadium. You cant kick me out because I havent done anything wrong.” I said as I turned to walk back to him.

     It was another stare down.

     ” Youre not….youre…well I cant say what I think of you…” He said, and turned around again.

     ” Youre out of line, and youre overstepping your job description. Usher people. Help people find their seats. Dont interfere with batting practice. Dont interfere with baseballs that come into the stands. You dont have any authority to tell people what they do with baseballs that they get. I wasnt the only person going after that ball. It just so happens I ended up with it. GET A REAL JOB.” I said as I hastly turned around, and left.

     Ill be at the Sundays game because I already bought tickets, and I was sitting in foul ball heaven. But I think Ill have to play the first base side for the game, and possibly the rest of the month until this blows over.

Game; June 6th 2010 Milwaukee Brewers Vs St Louis Cardinals

Gameballs; One

Autographs; None

Attendance; 40,467

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